YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
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