As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
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