I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
Randomize
