its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize
