do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
The struggles of a small town man whore
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
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