this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
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