Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Randomize
