I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
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