i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
Randomize
