I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
Randomize
