I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
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