he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
Randomize
