When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
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