It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
Randomize