she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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