he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
he drank half a bottle of bushmills, stood up to pee over the side, pissed his pants, sat in the puddle on the deck, told me my life goals were stupid and impossible, and wouldn't leave until 5am. by the time I got up at 8 I had 4 texts and 2 fb messages from him. AND HE STILL THINKS IT WENT WELL
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
Randomize
