I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
Randomize
