Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
Randomize
