kristin has been a bad kristin
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Randomize
