I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Randomize
