i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
oh god was she eating orange peels again
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
Randomize
