I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
Dignity is for republicans.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
Randomize
