Pregnant stripper...not hot.
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
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