too bad you live with your parents still
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
Randomize
