She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
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