so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Randomize
