Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
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