Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
Randomize
