I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
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