Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
This is my gift to your gina
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Randomize
