No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
the cop asked for your social security number and you gave her your high school locker combo
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
Randomize
