Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
Randomize
