Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
Randomize
