Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Randomize