I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
Randomize
