Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
Randomize
