were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
When the bouncer doesn't let you in... Don't ask him where he works so you could file a complaint with the better business bureau... It only proves him right.
It's 5 PM...and you're 35. Congrats on being an amazing human being.
Randomize
