theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
Randomize
