The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
Randomize