Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
Randomize
