i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
Randomize
