i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
Randomize
