belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I just bought the big bottle of Patron. It looks small. What have I done with my life?
Succeeded.
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
Randomize
