there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
Randomize
