he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
I will pee on everything he values.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
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