Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Randomize
