I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
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