I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
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