Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
Randomize
