Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
Randomize
